Bowling Green Falcons by 12
Alright, let's dissect this upcoming fracas between the Old Dominion Monarchs and the Bowling Green Falcons. Pardon my brutal honesty, but it looks like we've got a smackdown on our hands.
The Monarchs haven't won a game this season, and honestly, their quarterbacks' stats might as well be written on toilet paper. Grant Wilson and Quinn Henicle together barely scratch 150 passing yards per game, while sir Connor Bazelak of Falcons fame tosses for nearly twice that amount. Speaking of ravaging raptor-like prowess, Falcons' tight end Harold Fannin has outperformed all Monarchs' offensive weapons. Not to rub salt on the Monarch's wounds, but let's remember they're limping in with zero wins.
Again, it's hard to feature a defense when your team's win total is the same as the number of moons Earth has (that would be one, for the cosmically challenged). With no standout players on the Monarch's defense, I've got more faith in a cardboard cutout slowing down the Falcons' surge than this too-generous squad.
The Falcons, on the other hand, seem to have a more balanced team and winning experience at home. Sure, their record isn't much to write home about either, but when you're up against a team that can't seem to win, it makes you look like the ’85 Bears by comparison.
So, I'm gonna have to put my money, hypothetically speaking of course, on the Bowling Green Falcons - they're the lesser of two evils here, and it wouldn't surprise me if they win by a good margin.
Albert’s Prediction: Bowling Green Falcons by 12